Feb 13, 2012

toddler battles 2.5

Sometimes, I feel like a broken record.

Move your cup away from the edge of the table.

No picking nose.

Do you have to go potty?

Stop.

No.

Be quiet inside.

You have to hold hands in the parking lot.

Let's go potty.

STOP.

NO!

I have been wondering if my new sense of frustration with Cara is because we've all been passing around sicknesses for the past month, or because I can't handle Cara physically the way I could before, or because she's two and a half.  I think it might be a combination of all three.  The perfect toddler storm.

Don't get me wrong, Cara is a very easy child, all things considered.  But she is exactly like me.  Things must be done her way on her timeline which means that, lately, everything takes twice as long.  She wants to climb into her carseat, but she can't quite reach.  She wants to sit on the big potty all by herself, but she can't quite reach.  She wants to do everything all by herself, but she can't. quite. reach.  Letting her try makes her frustrated, but helping her leads to yelling and kicking and that limp thing that toddlers do. 

Sometimes, I feel like anything I ask Cara to do will get an automatic "NO." 

"Let Mommy fix your hair."  "No, I have to brush my teeth!" 
"Ok, let's brush your teeth." "No, I have to fix my hair!" 

Kind of like that.  I hate how frustrated this makes me, and I really hate when I allow this frustration to manifest itself to my girl.  Daddy had to run a bit of interference this morning after Cara flipped out when I tried to wash her face.  I think I actually said something to the effect of "fine, go to school with boogers on your face." Really??  Who is the toddler here and who is the adult?  Thank goodness Daddy can remain adult-like.

So, we find ourselves snuggling a lot.  Because when Cara and Mommy have a battle of wills, we both end up sad.  Cara's usually sad because she didn't get her way, she didn't win, and Mommy's usually sad because she didn't show enough patience, she could have done better.  We both need those snuggles at that moment.  We need to comfort each other, love each other, forgive each other.

Man, this Mommy-gig is a tough one.

6 comments:

  1. So relatable! I tend to turn into a 5yr old when battling with my 5yr old! It's not funny at the time but kinda comical after the fact, MY behavior that is.
    My almost 3yr old is the same way with doing things himself. God forbid I help him into the car when we're running late :)

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    1. It's ALWAYS when we're running late that they insist on climbing in all by themselves! :-)

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  2. It sure is!! And you're not alone there. Just like your blog says, there is no instruction manual, we are all learning as we go. A battle of wills is always tough, trust me, my daughter is 12 so I'm wishing you all the luck in the world!!

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    1. Learning as we go is definitely how it's happening around here!

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  3. Amen! It is hard but comforting to know that other parents are having the same struggles and it really must be a natural part of growing up for a child! But MAN everything seems to take forever and can become a struggle. I was laughing today bc every mom of a child in Jack's class (all 2-2.5) you can see STRUGGLING to get their child to the car. It's hardest for the ones with another baby who can't just carry them straight there to avoid the running off, the toddler drag (probably what you called the limp), the stopping, the "No!" episodes, etc.

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  4. I thought that two and a half was without question the hardest part thus far. You'll get through it, and don't listen to everyone--3 has been much better than they reported :)

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