Aug 25, 2012

over the hump

My students came back to school on Wednesday, and I was there on time.  Can I take a moment to bask in the victory of not being late yet?  We're over the hump, folks.  We made it through the first day of school!

Mornings are only a little crazy, which is honestly a pretty decent improvement over last school year.  I figured out a few tricks, silly things like showering right before I go to bed and having Cara's breakfast on the table before I go wake her up and putting my own clothes on at the last possible second to avoid the poop and spit up.  And so far, it's working.  PJ and I (plus children, obviously) have been walking out of the door at 7:15 with fanfare and celebration.  And to think that I was stressed and nervous about all of this...

Actually, I really was.  It was sort of all-consuming for a few weeks.  I spent way too many moments worrying about every single detail of how on earth I was going to make "going back to work for real" actually happen.  The funny thing about stress and worry is that it doesn't stop anything from happening.  The first day of school didn't cease to exist because I was worried about it.  In fact, I realized that all this stressing and worrying was keeping me from living, and I made a conscious decision to quit.  I'm done with that.  This life that I have is one that I would not change for anything, so why am I constantly worried about how to make it all work?  It already does.

This all made sense me to on Friday night.  I planned to go to a painting class with some girlfriends, but I was so, so tired by Friday afternoon that even going to do something fun felt like another chore.  I'm not a painter, there are things I need to do at home, blah, blah, blah went my inner monologue.  Fortunately, canceling would have still cost me some money, so I went.  And I had so much fun that I signed up to take another class in a few weeks.  

my dandelion that my purple-loving daughter immediately claimed for her room

On the way home from the class, I got to thinking about my attitude.  Why did I work myself up into such a bad mood?  Here I am, grumbling and whining through the blessings in my life when I should be enjoying them.  Savoring them.  So that's what I decided to do.

PJ spent all day today shooting guns at clay thingys, so it was just me and the two kiddos at home.  Normally, I would have been worrying about how I was going to manage both of them and run errands and clean up the house, and, and, and, but this time, I let all that go.  Not only did my house get mostly cleaned up (I bribed Cara to help me with the promise of a new toy, which was actually a Christmas toy that I hid in her closet {sneaky mommy}), but my dad came over and let me go to Target BY MYSELF, and then my friend Melissa stopped by with her daughter for a quick playdate.  Basically, life minus stress and worry equals snuggles, swirls, and swings.

there's the hidden Christmas toy and the happy three-year-old

um...yeah...

happy, adorable baby boy

look at them, telling secrets already


baby burrito quilt



4 comments:

  1. Thanks for sharing the lesson, it's one I need to learn as well.

    Your kids are adorable, but you know that already ;). And I still love your painting, I would pinkie wrestle Cara for it!

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  2. Love it! And that is what being a mom and having a family is all about ... enjoying the here and now! Way to go Jess!!

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  3. I am feeling your pain lately--the new fall schedule takes a while to adjust to, but I'm glad to hear you survived because that means I can, too! :) And your children are just adorable, btw!

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  4. Ok, I just read through a few of your recent posts. I've enjoyed reading. I don't know how you do it! I can barely get myself out of the house in the morning, I can't imagine getting two kids ready to go!

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