Apr 21, 2013

perspective

Sometimes being a working mom is like trying to do two things at once and be two places at once.  

Sometimes being a working mom is like trying to drive a train from an airplane.

Sometimes being a working mom is like juggling and hula hooping at the same time.

To be honest, there is nothing that can accurately describe the frustration of trying to do two very, very important things really, really well.  I wish I was a person who was okay with just doing okay, but I'm not.  I want to be the best at whatever I'm doing, or at least I want to be better than I was yesterday.  Or last week.  Or last year.  All this to say, lately, it's been tough to find the balance between work and home.

Balance is probably always going to elude me because the pendulum is always swinging, usually in the opposite direction of where I want it.  There are times when I simply must put more energy and time into my one hundred and twelve students.  A grading period is about to end or a stack of essays was just turned in.  A new unit of study is about to begin.  Or all of these things are happening at the same time right now.

However, I know that when I throw myself into my work too hard, I get angry and resentful.  Why should I focus so much on other people's children?  What about my own?  What about my husband?  What about the piles of laundry and the layers of dust?  I should be able to just do what I have to do.  I mean, the school year has ended for me eight times, and I have always met my deadlines.  Why should I think this year will be different?

I have decided that this year will, in fact, be different.  Everything will get done at work even if I don't stay until after 5.  Because there are two sweet babies who really want to come home and play in the yard for a bit before dinner.  And I want to make that happen for them.  And for me.

3 comments:

  1. Love your post Jessica!
    As a working mum, I also know how hard it is to balance work and home (even with a supportive husband and family)!
    I do managed to pick my kids (almost) every day from school and spend some time before they go to bed. Yet, this often means I have to catch on my workload in the wee hours of the night (it's not easy).
    Hope your commitment works this year :-)

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  2. Good for you for seeking a greater balance. It is a constant struggle for me too. I hope you can enjoy more time at home with the reassurance that your work will be fine. : )

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  3. I concur! Finding a balance is an ongoing battle. Some weeks I do fantastic, and other weeks I feel like I fail, and I'm pretty darn sure that's how it's going to be forever and ever. Probably whether you are a working mom or not, everyone has their battles. As a working mom myself, I love to hear from other working moms! Sounds like you are doing an amazing job at the juggling act. We can do hard things! Fist bump! :)

    xoxo
    Meg
    meandmine-blog.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete

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